Small Town Shenanigans

Alright Lads,

Weathers been pretty sweet this week hasn't it! Loving this glimpse of ACTUAL SUNSHINE! You watch, it will piss it down all next week now. Jinxed it.

Anyway, I'm currently on the train, on my way to see my favourite gal for her leaving do (stupid traveller! *sobs*) and of course it will be a boozy weekender as per usual! I'm not going to lie to you, I love a drop of the old dancing juice.

So I thought I'd share with you some of my shenanigans that myself and my friends get up to on a night out, even if it is just down the pub.

Now I simply refuse to take responsibility for my actions, it was all tequila. Also, there may be some slight exaggerations and some of it is all real. Its up to you to decide!

• Start a band.

So whilst listening to a band on in the pub, we were a few tequilas and Jagerbombs down and decided during their little interval that we would start our own band. I nominated myself as lead singer, obviously (voice of an angel over here) but also as the drummer. Believe it or not, I actually had a few lessons when I was younger. Anyway, as the night went on we recruited a number of members, named our self "Wrong Direction" and came up with a slogan?! Which I'm definitely not going to tell you, because it's even cringier than this story already is. Anyway, we are yet to debut, currently missing a manager and our genre varies from country to grime. Nothing like us on the market at the mo! Watch this space.

• Befriend a fox

This speaks for itself really doesn't it. We found him on our way home, named him Aragog (HP reference) and yeah. Lovely chap.

•  Recreate Dirty Dancing

This has become a habit with my little partner in crime, PIC if you will, and we like to simply act out the big lift from the iconic scene. Obviously I'm Patrick Swayze (he was such a babe) because I have the moves. However we never actually manage it but still walk away feeling very successful and impressed with ourselves. At least I do anyway. *hair flick* NAILED IT.

• Talk epiphanies 

In a small town, you can't go anywhere without bumping into someone you know. Especially the pub. Whenever I bump into someone and we get a good conversation going, it always gets a bit deep. I'm a great listener/agony aunt. What can I say? Anyway I recently got into a conversation about an epiphany someone had. If I remember right, it was about putting bricks in a wall, not letting the wall get too high, failing to maintain the wall and something about life admin?! The shit people come out with after a few pints...

• Shots with the family

If your family won't do a round of tequila, jager, sambuca (the devil) and baby guinness, all in one night, then are you even family?!

• Have a debate with Conor McGregor about Beyonce

So, if you don't know who Conor McGregor is, google him. Absolute boss! So I spotted his lookalike in the bar and had to tell him. Of course he had heard it a million times before, yes I had to be one of those people. (Embarrassing drunk) Somehow we got onto the topic of Beyonce (MY LOVE) and he wasn't a fan. So I simply had to politely put him in his place... I slightly remember telling him something along the lines of how amazing she was to 'bare her soul' (christ) on an album about her husband cheating on her. Long story short. I think I managed to persuade him that she was fabulous, because she is. I WON.

• Go to the gym

I wasn't sure I should tell you this one as it is probably frowned upon. But when you are signed up to a 24hr gym it happened to be a temptation after all the pubs were shut. Sometimes after a few, you don't want to go home and become a, what I call, night-chaser. So after this genius idea, we turned up, I believe I had a little jog, we were in there for approximately 5 minutes and then left. Altogether pointless, potentially dangerous and a bit silly but thats what being intoxicated is all about right?! I regret nothing!

So there we have it. What we get up down the boozer. Of course there are more stories but I'll save those for a rainy day.

I wonder what this weekend will bring?! I'm sure last time I went to visit my friend, I had a conversation with a stranger in the pub about gammon being my favourite food... Drink safe peeps.

HAVE A GOOD ONE